Last month I came across a quote by Rumi. “What you are seeking is seeking you.” It resonated with me on a deeply spiritual level. Since the passing of my grandmother earlier this year I’ve been trying to find my bearing. (I will most likely speak of her often this month as I am still processing the loss). She was the North to my compass and my direction has been erratic since. The last few weeks however I noticed a change.
I felt her guidance, trying to get me back on track. Quite literally the moment I became active about pursuing my goals, opportunities started to open up. Doors that I didn’t know existed appeared, their bells already ringing. Then the Rumi quote manifested and it all made sense.
I don’t believe in random occurrences. I prefer to live in a world of interconnectedness, where every action has a reaction, a ripple effect, a connecting piece of the puzzle. Prior to this I was stuck in a hazy routine of motions; a passive participant of life with my family. Habitually I glued myself to screens because a sedentary mind likes sedentary company. A prisoner of my own actions, or lack thereof I didn’t know how to escape. Until one day the dark fog dissipated. Through the clearing I saw a way out. I don’t know how this happened, but I believe it was a matter of being ready to accept the future. Suddenly I didn’t feel like sitting around watching TV so much, suddenly I noticed the new expressions on my daughter’s face, the attentiveness of my husband I had been brushing off. I started to believe that the things in my mind could actually happen, if I simply tried.
What I have been seeking, has been seeking me. I just had to show up and say hello.